The phone/iPad are visible in Finder, and I can browse their contents. they are on Wifi as well as being connected via USB

I have deleted Xcode. I cleared out the caches. STILL NOTHING. I went into general - reset on the phone and reset location, which will cause it to ask me to trust the device again upon reconnection. Still nothing. I can now get this error SOMETIMES. For Pete's sake..., I can't even upload an image now. It says "The tunnel connection failed while the system tried to connect to the device", and the next line is "Tunnel NWConnection closed by remote side with no error" Note, I can pair this phone and my iPad NO PROBLEM to an Intel based laptop that is too slow to use effectively. This needs to get fixed immediately or I'm dead in the water.